Eight

But he almost lost even Su Wei

Chen Mobei hesitated for a moment, but ultimately got up to answer the phone. I slammed down the chopsticks and secretly followed him out.

O heavens, I beseech you, if there is a bullet, let it pierce through my heart, allowing me to be completely liberated from this filthy world

In an instant, I was suffocated

I delude myself into thinking that as long as I remain silent, as long as I do not awaken, that night will be sealed away, faded, and vanish, ultimately turning into dust that has no connection to my life

Until a few months ago, the letter stated that Lánshān had fallen in love.

First, grandmother suddenly fell ill

In order to break the deadlock, Zhou Jianian and I invited Lan Shan and Chen Mobei to have hot pot.

When Lanshan smiled, it had a self-mocking quality; I didn't expect to experience heartbreak so soon

I intended to tell her that it is not as you think, but before I could say it, Lanjian told me: "Su Wei, I am going back to Beijing."

Lan Shan and I will stroll hand in hand on the weekend. As I sip my milk tea while basking in the sun, I will experience a genuine sense of satisfaction

Many years later, the elder lady passed away, and the aunt returned to her hometown with her illegitimate daughter from a foreign land. This is how it is portrayed in the television series, isn't it

Chen Mobei softly said: "From now on, there will be neither Gu Meng nor Lanshan in my life"

Chen Mobei's phone rang inopportunely, and he glanced at Lanshan, who appeared completely indifferent as if she had not heard any sound at all

This is how I overheard the time and place of Chen Mobei's meeting with Gu Meng. Although Zhou Jianian advised me that friends should maintain a sense of propriety and that this matter is not for me to interfere in

Jia Nian and I cried until we could hardly breathe. That night we slept together, and he held me from behind, burying his head in my hair. I felt a large area of my neck become wet.

A dampness

Then she said to Jianian: "Although you and your mother have not told me what exactly happened over the years, I still have a general idea in my heart. I am old, but I am not foolish."

She thought this time it was merely a caterpillar, but she truly lacked understanding of the greed and brutality inherent in human nature

Before Lan Shan went to Beijing, she had never seen Mo Bei again. No matter how Mo Bei tried to find her or called her, she always managed to think of a way to avoid him

With just these two sentences, I understood that the hatred I have harbored throughout my life is likely condensed in that one glance I directed at Qing Tian. If Qing Tian were to meet my gaze in that moment, she would surely never forget it for the rest of her life

Chen Mobei found it quite laughable. He retorted to Gu Meng, asking whether, when you betrayed me for those perfumes, handbags, designer trench coats, and this damned MINI of yours, you ever considered my feelings

My parents are living examples; they have made me understand one thing: some love truly cannot be erased by time, space, or the countless people interwoven in life. Do you understand what I mean

I think perhaps she has also blamed me in her heart for not telling her earlier about the matter between Chen Mobei and Gu Meng

What he thinks is no longer important to Lanshan

On the night that Lan Shan left, I told Zhou Jianian that I wanted to keep Chen Mobei company. Zhou Jianian nodded and reminded me to call him after I got home

For many years, they only communicated through letters. Lan Shan's mother was an exceedingly proud woman and would never allow herself to become the third party that disrupts someone else's marriage

After we both sighed simultaneously, he succinctly explained it to me

Qingtian came crying to pull that shadow, her words unclear as she shouted: "Wasn't it said to just scare her? It was just to scare her..."

That night, the eel rice at Lanshan's table remained untouched until the bill was settled. Chen Mobei, fearing that she would be hungry on her way back, wanted to accompany her to buy some cake. However, Lanshan smiled and said, "I will never go to that shop again in my life"

I recall that on a summer afternoon, Lanshan looked up at me and smiled. She said that she was very happy because someone was willing to help her carry that burden, yet my heart ached.

Life is the most important thing, isn't it? In comparison to life, there are some things that can be lost, right?

But we cannot go back, we cannot go back

But I can feel nothing anymore, my soul has left my body and soared into the sky

However, the time bombs buried in life do not take us into account; they only know that when the fuse burns out, a loud bang will follow. They do not consider the earth-shattering changes that will occur in our lives after this explosion

I felt his body tremble slightly, and I heard myself softly calling his name over and over again, yet I could not utter a single word of comfort

Upon their first encounter, Lan Shan immediately sensed something unusual between Gu Meng and Mo Bei. It was certainly not a meeting between ordinary friends, as evidenced by Gu Meng's expression of extreme shock and Mo Bei's look of utter astonishment, both of which Lan Shan keenly observed.

Qingtian believed that as long as she paid the money, it would be sufficient; she merely wanted to scare Su Wei. It was akin to when she was young and found a certain girl in their class displeasing, gathering a group of people to surround that girl after school and throw caterpillars at her.

When Lan Shan's father entered that marriage with a purpose, he was unaware of Lan Shan's existence. At that time, Lan Shan was merely a small bundle of vitality in her mother's womb, arriving in this city with her strong-willed mother

I lay by her bedside, crying uncontrollably, and she turned to comfort me, saying: "Child, if Grandma passes away, you must take good care of Jianian. In the areas where he lacks understanding, you should be more forgiving."

That night we drank to the point of inebriation, and I vaguely remember that Mo Bei cried, but perhaps I am mistaken

Chen Mobei looked at me seriously and said something that made me want to slap him to death

Qingtian once approached me, of course behind Zhou Jianian's back. She said a great deal, with the central idea being to persuade me to leave Zhou Jianian

I did not expect that when I was hiding behind the tree, Lanjian had not gone home. She had also been following Chen Mobei all the way, watching from across the street as Gu Meng got out of the car and embraced Chen Mobei. They argued, she cried, he yelled at her, but they embraced each other again. In the end, she slapped him and left in a huff

Lan Shan did not need to know their dialogue; even if this were a black-and-white silent film, she understood all the meaning.

What finally infuriated Gu Meng was Chen Mobei's remark, "Do you know that you are no different from a prostitute? The only difference is that you are wholesale, while they are retail." It was this statement that earned him a slap.

I am quite despicable, but I believe I am still somewhat better than Gu Meng on the other end of the line

She did not realize what a ruthless character she had found herself entangled with. Having lived a life free from want since childhood, she naturally could not comprehend that there are individuals in this world who, in order to survive, can disregard laws and norms. For the sake of sustenance and wealth, they can break free from constraints and cause destruction

On the night before we were to return, Mo Bei called me and said directly: "Su Wei, Gu Meng came to see me."

Later, I went to a roadside stall to drink with Chen Mobei. He told me that Gu Meng did not allow him to be with anyone else, regardless of who it was, because Chen Mobei could only love Gu Meng

I couldn't help but slam my hand on the table, pointing at Chen Mobei's forehead and scolding him fiercely. I said, "Are you an idiot? You were so deeply in love with Gu Meng before; how could there be any part of your past that doesn't have her shadow? How could you be foolish enough to tell everything to Lanshan? Let me tell you, if it were me in this situation, I would have slapped you long ago. It's a wonder that Lanshan isn't even angry. Do you understand that being together requires some timely concealment?"

I stared at her blankly, and she shook her head with a smile, "Su Wei, I am fine, I can hold on."

Before I lost consciousness, I only remember Qing Tian's small body being engulfed by the darkness of that alley, she was so small, so lonely

I waited for him at the outdoor café near the Mo Bei Company, looking haggard, and he approached me with a similarly haggard expression.

When confronted with such a question from him, I generally do not respond; I simply slap him across the face. I believe that wasting time on emotional appeals or reasoning with such people is less direct and effective than resorting to violence

After a long period of tranquil life, I almost suspected that the rest of my life would continue in such peace. Zhou Jianian found a job selling digital products; the pay was not much, but it was sufficient for his needs.

Chen Mobei is different from me; he has sincerely loved someone and then been hurt. He devoted all of his complete feelings to Gu Meng, and I think he probably does not have an equal love to give to Lan Shan.

Her mother told her never to wait for others to offer charity

But how can hot pot be eaten like this? So quiet, so silent, the atmosphere is so awkward

If she had not mentioned that night on the phone many years later, I fear I would have forgotten those events that followed

It was only after such a long time that she came to understand the origins of her life. Initially, her parents were very much in love, but due to circumstances at her father's home, they were forcibly separated.

Thus, this fool did the most foolish thing; he revealed his past with Gu Meng to Lan Shan in its entirety

When Zhou Jianian walked in from the alley, I had already been wrapped in Qing Tian's clothes. She looked very sad, frantically trying to tidy up my messy hair.

The last thought that flashed through Qing Tian's mind as he fell to the ground was, why is this happening?

He has told me more than once: "The kind of life you had with Lu Yihan before is something I cannot provide for you at the moment. Have you thought it through? Do you still want to be with me?"

During the weekend, when Lánshān couldn't find me, she pleaded with Mòběi to accompany her to buy a cake. It is truly strange that those who love the same person can also love the cakes produced by the same bakery.

I looked at her childlike face and wondered what it would be like if Lanshan were to request or even threaten Gu Meng in the same way

After Grandma's health fully recovered, both Jia Nian and I lost some weight

As I walked at the entrance of the familiar dark alley from days gone by, I was suddenly silenced by a large hand covering my mouth, followed immediately by another hand beginning to tear at my clothes

I wonder if when Lu Yihan left here, she felt the same way as Lanshan did

Gu Meng does not remember her, but she indeed remembers Gu Meng. Lan Shan possesses a remarkable ability to never forget the words and people she has encountered, so she clearly recalls that this is not her first time meeting Gu Meng

I cannot tell her to die, the person I love, whom I will love for a lifetime

Chen Mobei and I sat on the bench, gazing at the wall. The wall was adorned with numerous photographs, one of which captured a girl with a cold and aloof expression. Neither of us had ever seen a hint of sorrow on that face.

I had been dozing off for a long time in Chen Mobei's apartment. I knew that Zhou Jianian and Chen Mobei were taking turns caring for me, but I just refused to open my eyes to look at them.

Occasionally, the four of us gather together to watch movies, sing, hike, and play cards, with the loser having a white sticker placed on their face

However, fate does not have an "if"

Lan Shan was educated from a young age with the principle that "it is better to have one's palms facing down than to have them facing up"

Gu Meng still cries like she did back in the day, and she begins to bring up the past, which is too much. Chen Mobei's life can never escape the shadow of Gu Meng, those moments they walked hand in hand, those tender years, those emotions as pure as water.

He paused and said, "It's nothing much, she just called to ask me if it would still be possible for her to come back if she regrets it now"

But she did not see my gaze

I understand that when I conveyed all of this to Chen Mobei, he also understood it

Qingtian trembled as she wanted to say something to Jiannian, or perhaps she just wanted to say something to herself. She murmured, repeating in a barely audible voice: "This is not my intention, I just wanted to scare her a little..."

So after we finished eating hot pot that day, she insisted on taking a taxi back by herself. I held her hand, wanting to say something, but she just smiled and signaled to me that there was no need for further words

They can only endure and restrain themselves

But she has seen me once and spoke to me about her mother's story

I can only embrace him with all my strength, which may provide more comfort than pale words

But he turns a blind eye to it

I have met Lanshan's mother, and it was only after meeting her that I understood why Lanshan possesses wisdom and aloofness that surpass her age; this is largely attributed to having such an elegant and dignified mother.

On the other side, Chen Mobei successfully entered the company he had served during his school years. They did not go back on their word, and the treatment he received far exceeded that of a fresh graduate

During dinner, Lánshān remained silent, and Mòběi, feeling guilty, naturally understood why she was acting unusually

She only briefly mentions in her letter the growth of Lanshan, that she has grown teeth, learned to walk, can speak, has learned to read, has started elementary school, has advanced to middle school, and has been admitted to university

When Qingtian circled in front of him to block his way, he finally said in a low voice, "Get lost"

I underestimated Zhou Jianian's love for me. Later, I often wondered, if I had pulled myself together a little earlier, would Zhou Jianian's life have been rewritten?

The enormous roar of the airplane taking off perhaps truly carved a gash in Chen Mobei's heart

At that moment, many scenes flashed before my eyes like a movie, each frame moving so quickly: my family, my friends, the ones I love, and those who have loved me...

She does not allow him to visit their daughter, yet he has indeed managed to understand the traces of Lanshan's life over the years solely through these few words.

My hands and feet are completely powerless, only my throat still has strength. When I finally gathered all my energy to scream, a cold knife was pressed against the carotid artery in my neck

I clearly heard the sound of the fabric on my body being torn apart, which seemed so intense and abrupt in this excessively quiet night. I closed my eyes and gave up the struggle

The nauseating, beastly stench sprayed onto my face, and I had already given up the struggle

Tomorrow, the mountains will be distant, and the affairs of the world will be vague and unclear

Lin Lanshan, who has never been willing to shed tears in front of others, touched her face after Chen Mobei and I left

I nearly spat out my latte in disbelief as I looked at Mo Bei, "Is this what you call nothing happening? You should tell her to go die!"

However, Lanshan is a girl who fundamentally does not understand how to fight for herself. Perhaps it is not that she does not understand; rather, she is too concerned about her own demeanor and is unwilling to let herself become embroiled in a messy tug-of-war.

She is neither Gu Meng, nor I, nor Qing Tian

What is going on with Gu Meng? I asked Chen Mobei

At that moment, I only wished for time to pass a little faster, for the sky to brighten a little sooner, faster, even faster...

Indeed, it is the case that many of us enter into romantic relationships at an early age, often before we even understand what love truly is, and by then we have already grown weary of it. We engage in emotional games, lamenting with a maturity beyond our years that true love is hard to find, while failing to genuinely reflect on our own attitudes towards love.

The small Qing Tian was grabbed by the shadow by her long hair and violently slammed against the mottled wall

I turned my head to look at him, and he laughed heartily, "But it's alright, I still have Su Wei."

I stared blankly at this fool, and I admit that for a moment, I found his words quite reasonable

Jia Nian and I bought standing tickets and rushed to the countryside overnight. The overhead lights of the night train illuminated our faces in a ghostly white. We stood in the smoking area, holding each other tightly. For the first time, I understood the vulnerability of boys; they are not like girls, who can cry, throw tantrums, vent their anger, and express their emotions.

When Qing Tian burst out, I was already in despair. I thought everything was set in stone, that my life, Su Wei, would forever bear this nightmare, and that my life would be eternally suspended in this night.

I told many cold jokes, and everyone politely chuckled a few times, which only made me appear more foolish

But what can I do to make her understand that I only wish for her happiness

Yet I was still pushed to the ground by that dark shadow, and as I looked at the vast night sky, for the first time in my life, I experienced what it truly meant to be in despair

Chen Mobei looked at me with innocent eyes, enduring my accusations. In the end, he said to me very seriously: "Su Wei, I am not like you. You have been in many relationships, you have been pursued by many people, you know what to say and when to say it. But I am not. My past only includes Gu Meng; I have only loved one person, Gu Meng, throughout my life. She represents all my feelings over the past twenty-plus years. I do not know about deception, concealment, or manipulation. I only know that as a boyfriend, I should give my partner at least the respect she deserves. I should be honest about my past, which she wants to understand." My past only includes Gu Meng; I have only loved one person, Gu Meng, throughout my life. She represents all my feelings over the past twenty-plus years. I do not know about deception, concealment, or manipulation. I only know that as a boyfriend, I should give my partner at least the respect she deserves. I should be honest about my past, which she wants to understand.

The elderly person's illness is not severe, but no matter how we persuade her, she refuses to leave the countryside. She has her reasons; fallen leaves return to their roots

A fulfilling life cannot be surpassed by anything else

I understand what is about to happen, an overwhelming fear has awakened a part of me that I had never even realized existed, and I fought with all my might, like a wild beast

She was unaware that the moonlight-like white diamond necklace around her neck, much like Su Wei's beauty, would awaken the primal beast within this shadow, a dual greed for wealth and beauty

I watched her slowly fall like a plant, as that shadow once again enveloped my terrified eyes

Zhou Jianian picked me up from the ground, my gaze focused on his face, and only after confirming that this was someone I could trust did I finally slump drowsily in his embrace